My name is Brad. That’s it. It’s not Bradley. It’s not Bradford. It’s on my birth certificate and Social Security card as just plain old Brad.
The original name when I started this blog in 2008 was How is Bradley? You’ll see all my posts, except for the most recent, tagged as being written by Bradley.
So what gives? Well, in the past, for whatever reason, once people got to know me they would stop calling me Brad and start calling me Bradley. I have no idea why, but it always meant we we’d become close so I took it as a term of affection. Because I was trying to connect with others is why I named the blog How Is Bradley?
Things change. Since moving to California most people stopped calling me Bradley and stuck with my real name, Brad. It’s not that I haven’t made close connections. I have very dear friends here, but whatever it is about California, they stick with Brad. Maurice usually calls me Bradley, and so do a few others, but not many.
Therefore, I have decided to no longer label my posts as by Bradley. What do I want you to call me? It doesn’t matter. You can call me Brad or Bradley. Whichever you feel comfortable with. Nobody’s ever called me Bradford, but if that’s what you prefer then go ahead. There’s something kinda dignified about it.
I have a Zoom appointment with my psychiatrist shortly. While I likely need a change in meds I’m going to act like everything is hunky dory. She’s too much of a quack for me to trust her messing with my body chemistry. I can wait until I find a replacement to deal with that. Btw. For those who aren’t familiar with me, I am not anti drugs. I’m a firm believer in a better life through chemistry. Proper medication saved my life. I just don’t trust my current psychiatrist.
Fifty-Seven Years and a Day
I had a very nice birthday yesterday. Though he had to work, Maurice stayed home so we could be together. I sat listening to my audiobook most of the day while he sat on the bed taking calls from clients and working on their computers. At sunset we met some friends on the beach for dinner. There wasn’t much of a sunset to see because of all the clouds and smoke, but all of us being together was better than any old sunset anytime. It got cold and windy after the sun went down but we all stuck it out as long as we could for good conversation.
The Audiobook Again
I’m still working on it. I’m still working on it. Even though I have my psychiatry appointment in the morning and have to do some recording for the podcast in the afternoon, I am going to finish listening to it before midnight tonight. You’d think it’d be easy, but since I read it numerous times during editing I have a pretty good idea how it ends. At one point I slept through an entire chapter. I had to play it again.
The Pressure is on
With all that’s been going on, I’ve fallen so far behind on my latest WIP (work in progress) From the beginning, I loved the concept, I’ve found the characters I’ve developed to be great fun, I’ve mostly completed my outline, though I don’t have all the clues in place yet, and I love most of the way the novel begins. My frustration is that it’s been so long that I’ve put fingers to keyboard to work on it that it’s going to take a major kick in the ass to get me back on track with this particular story. I normally don’t edit my first draft. “The first draft of anything is shit” is attributed to Ernest Hemingway. Wise words. But, to get those juices going, I think it will be best to go back to the beginning and start editing. By the time I reach where I stopped I should have a good grasp on how to keep moving forward. I’m already 99% sure that the entire first chapter should be scrapped anyway so why not?
My goal for some time has been to write a novella as a giveaway to my readers. I have the concept much more developed than the novel. The novel takes priority, though. The novella will have to wait, and so will the 10,000 notes I have around the house of ideas for it.
Health & Fitness
I’ve been doing great eating the right things and for awhile there I was getting plenty of exercise. I did cheat just a little bit with the food yesterday. Though the amount of sweets I ate would be considered miniscule by most people’s standards, it was way too much for me. Hell, it was my birthday though.
Exercise has been a whole different story. I did so well for awhile walking around 6 miles every morning, followed by a good workout with dumbbells. With the gastro-bypass surgery it’s important to do resistance training as well as cardio, otherwise the body starts eating at the muscle as well as the fat. I can already tell that’s been the case in some areas and it’s the last thing I want. The flabby skin will be hard enough to deal with. I need to do some prevention as much as I can. (sigh) I’ll try to start again tomorrow.
The Debate
I’m debating if I should watch the debate tonight. On the one hand, I think Trump is such an easy target that Biden will mop the floor with him. On the other hand, I honestly can’t stand to watch Trump or hear his voice for more than a few seconds. I’ll read what he has to say, or doesn’t have to say, but I literally feel ill in my stomach when I hear his voice. Plus, maybe Biden won’t come across as strong as I’d like him to. I’m sure he’s been well versed by his team to stick with the facts. The facts should bury #45 except for one thing – he’ll lie his fucking ass off. Chris Wallace, the moderator, has said he will not be fact checking the candidates during the debate. He says that’s not his job. So, where does that leave us? Biden will have to call Trump on his bullshit alone and Trump will babble bullshit that’s nonsensical and full of lies. His cult will continue to follow him, but maybe, just maybe, those 4 or 5 undecideds out there will have their decisions swayed in the right direction. I don’t remember how undecides there are, but if the polls are accurate, it’s nearly impossible to believe. The candidates can’t be further apart on any issue. How can someone still be saying, “Hmmm, I’m not sure yet?”
USA Today says to watch the debate on their website and they’ll be fact checking the candidates in real time. I don’t know how anyone will be able to type that fast when #45 speaks, but I’m sure they’ll have plenty of spare keyboards around to replace the ones that burn out with overuse within minutes.
Part of me says it’s part of my civic duty to watch. Is it? I know Trump is a lying piece of shit and nothing is going to sway my vote. If Trump proves that Biden eats babies for breakfast, I’m still not changing my vote. Our very democracy depends on it too much.
I’ll likely decide at the last minute whether to watch tonight or not. My guess is, despite it being hard on my stomach, I’ll watch it.
What do you plan to do? Are you going to watch the debate?
Conclusion
It’s going to be one busy ass day in this crazy fucked up world. I need to focus on my little bubble from being a little less fucked up than the rest of it.
One of my friends usually live-blogs the debates. Maybe you can find someone who’s doing that too.
That’s a good idea. Might be better for me to read it rather than watch it
So much to respond to!
I won’t be watching the debate either. I watched intently during the last election and the first 2 1/2 years. I started to taper off and found there was absolutely no benefit to hearing from him directly. We now know there is no bottom. There is no moral core. There is nothing his followers won’t say, do, profess, and perhaps believe. This year I been saying, like many others, that this election will determine if this is still America or not. he last month, I’ve come to believe that it doesn’t matter who wins the next election. America as a liberal democracy is over. I don’t know what we become, but if there is one party who isn’t willing to live by those tenants, and they have proven for years now they are not, than the concept and fact of America crumbles – actually has crumbled.
I’ve heard the concept of the shitty first draft referred to by Elizabeth Gilbert and Ann Lamott, both in interviews and in their books , respectively, about over coming fear to live a creative life and writing, Perhaps they were referencing Hemingway.
And finally Happy Birthday!! I’ve got you beet by several months. I have a big count down posted in our living room, days until 60! As of today it’s 1001. I want to be a certain kind of 60 year old, and I have 1001 days to get there! Do you have a 60 year old self you envision?
Love you Bradley!
I guess I kind of have some 60 year old goals now that I think of it. Maurice and I have been talking about building a tiny house for years. We’ve created the blueprints ourselves on paper and will just need to have an architects touch when it comes time to build it. The other option, as I stated before, is to move to Uruguay. I find this lovely little country fascinating. It’s my understanding, a tiny house in Uruguay is not likely to happen. They haven’t jumped on the bandwagon the way much of the world has. Shipping container homes have become popular there and that’s what we originally planned. They can be made into beautiful homes.
Specifically for me, is to release at least 4 more books. It’s a tad faster pace than I’ve been doing now, but it’s my goal. In addition, I’d really love to start the new series I’ve mentioned before. It’s one I’m very excited about, but people want to spend more time with Mitch O’Reilly and I have plenty more of his story to tell. I guess the number of books isn’t as important as much as how I stay productive on a daily basis. That needs to improve.
Lastly, and most important, is I want to be alive. Realizing 60 was approaching is what prompted me to get the gastric bypass surgery. My health (blood pressure, cholesterol, blood sugar, etc.) have all been excellent for many years. I want to ensure it stays that way. I want to be around for awhile.
The debate is on past my bedtime (I go to bed early because I wake up at 530 for school) so I haven’t decided if I am going to stay up to watch it or DVR it. Like you I don’t have the stomach for Trump and he makes my blood boil. And I will really be upset at all of his low blows he will be making toward Biden. I just hope Biden remains calm and doesn’t let Trump get the best of him. Trump wants to make him look like he is out of control.
I think Biden needs to be angry. I believe that’s a side the side of him American people need to see. He won’t back down and put up with Trump’s bullshit. The key is he will need to be angry, yet look like he’s under control at all times.