Apparently I’m in a melancholy mood this morning, because these are all questions that ran through my mind as I walked to the coffee shop this morning. So, today is my day to not be as light hearted as normal.
Why is it I can be in the best mood, but when the wind blows in my eyes, and the tears start to roll down, I will start feeling sad?
Why is it that the gates of my apartment complex were almost always left open until three men were gunned down two weeks ago across the street? Why do I know that they will start being blocked open regularly in about a month? Why do we never learn from our mistakes?
Why do my neighbors turn their heads away when I walk by and barely mumble when I say “good morning”?
Why is it that I’m over 100 pounds overweight but my glucose is normal and my cholesterol is low? However, potassium, which is normally considered healthy, registers dangerously high for me?
Why is it when I called the health clinic they told me the earliest they could get me in to see my regular doctor would be next Friday, but when I told them it was an urgent situation and I could see anyone they told me it’d be next Saturday?
Why is it that Maurice and I worked with other volunteers to get same gender marriage legalized in California, yet now that it is legal we can’t marry because it would seriously affect my benefits?
I’m sorry Bradley that you are feeling down today. “All you have to do is think positive and you will be all right.” What a crock of S**T is what I think too when people say that to me. But, I do hope it made you smile. I too think the marriage thing sucks…it makes no sense why two people would need less income than one…you know what I mean. I sucks. My thinking gets all distorted when I get depressed (below baseline depression) and everything looks bad or feels bad. Hang in there and hope it gets better today.((((hugs))))Clueless
Sorry to hear you are feeling so down. Life does have a way of working out. Sometimes it takes a while.
Thank you to all of you for your support. I’m feeling manic now so I guess you can say I’m doing better. I just needed to ponder some things this morning.
Nothing profound to write here, except sending you a big hug back Bradley! ugh. I think the depression makes my mind explode with questions like you are asking. It’s like everything out of sync or wrong in my life or world around me is expanded beyond comprehension in my mind, then anxiety takes over from there! Hang in there, and I’m cheering you on with the weight loss!:)
Dear Bradley,So sorry to read that you’re feeling sad. When I used to feel that way, it was my “depression speaking.” At least that’s what my doctor said. It’s not that things like the ones you mentioned wouldn’t have ordinarily bothered me, but when I was depressed, they made me feel so deeply sad! Hope you feel better.Susan
Wow, a lot of questions today. All of which I’d prolly ask too. Lotsa Love and luck and P.S. Depakote will raise your K level….luv ya—