This weeks weekly wrap-up is mixed. I lost weight last week, but my overall mood took a dive. The positive is my novel is going well.
Mood
As I did last week, I’m measuring my mood based on my hygiene. I showered most days, but it was a struggle. Rarely do I shower earlier than 5:30 pm, which is just before Maurice gets off work. There were a few days I skipped them altogether. I’m certain if Maurice was away for the week that I would have skipped cleaning up the entire time.
I think it’s time to talk with my pdoc about changing my meds again. He hates it when I tell him my meds are keeping me too low, but they are. It was probably about 3 – 4 years ago when I last walked into his office in a manic state. Based on that incident he likes to keep me on the low range. After that incident, the only way I was able to get him to adjust my meds is because Maurice went along and practically demanded he changed them. Looks like now I may have to go through the process again.
I know, I know, most people with BP complain that they can’t handle the downside. That they feel weighed down, but I feel fully confident that I need some kind of adjustment. I hope it won’t be necessary to take my henchman, Maurice.
Weight and Fitness
First, let’s get the statistics out of the way:
My weight loss from last week was 1.8 lbs which brings me down to 262.2 lbs
My weight when I first joined Weight Watchers was 303.4 for a total loss of 41.2 lbs.
My goal this month was to lose 6 lbs. I only lost 3.8, but I’m okay with that. There’s still plenty of months ahead to catch up to my annual goal of being under 200 lbs by December 31st.
The start of the week I did well, but towards the end I was eating like crazy. It also is when my mood went down. Those two things coincide on a regular basis.
Writing
I said last week that I was going to check out a new writer’s critique group and I did. It’s tough to get a new meeting started and last week’s meeting proved that to be true. I don’t have the time or the patience for that, so I won’t be going back. I love the Saturday morning group that I’m attending so I’ll stick with that. It’s a group of highly skilled writers who give excellent feedback. I shared more of Chapter 6 and I received high praise for the humor and received good notes regarding suggested changes. They were minor so I left feeling rather smug.
One thing that has always inspired me is your raw honesty about what’s going on–that’s real life, and something we all need more of. I struggle with moods, too. This morning I read a blog post about the guilt that comes from people telling her to have a good time–when that isn’t even a possibility given her depression. I really related.
As difficult as it was to try to be transparent in my blogging, first with my healing blog, then changed to Writing Memoir (mandy) I’ve had to start over as scout-anonymous blogger. Unfortunately there are people, when you write memoir (even when you never use real names ), that go to great lengths to stop you from speaking. As long as we find ways to share the reality of abuse and mood disorders, that’s the important thing. Good luck with your wt loss program and writing–you’re still moving forward 🙂
Thank you for the kind words, Mandy…uh, Scout. I’m grateful that I have this blog that allows me to be open and honest about what I’m feeling and going through. That’s something I promised myself when I started. I’m sorry about the troubles you’ve experienced with your blogs, but I’m happy you’re still blogging.
It’s wonderful you can feel safe in being you, Bradley. I got away with it for three years, and it took one year for me to be so brave as to use my real name. Once my memoir came out, I tried to maintain my courage, but it got exhausting. Knowing me I’ll “come out” again. 🙂
Keep writing that novel and focusing on your weight goal. You can do it!!!!
Thank you, Andrew. I think I can do it too. I just have to accept that it may not be as fast as I would like.
Sorry to hear you are feeling low again. Hopefully your doctor will get your meds right again. Congratulations on your continued weight loss! Slow and steady is good. It’s still progress and you are succeeding. Woo Hoo! I’m happy to hear your novel is moving along. Chapter 6 already. Wow. From all your posts about them, your regular writing group sounds like they are very supportive. You are real, Bradley and it’s good to “hear your voice”.
Your comment is all kinds of wonderful, Journey. Yes, the novel is \coming along nicely. Once I get a little more into it, I’ll tell more about it, and yes my writing group is awesome. Being real is all I know how to be.